Sure, the regular horoscope is great, and the alignment of the stars can tell us a lot about the person that we are, but food can tell us even more. Specifically Thanksgiving food. Whether it’s mashed potatoes or gravy or your aunt’s weird casserole, there is a designated hearty food that describes what you’re like at your innermost core.
We put our minds together with a bunch of scientists, chefs and astro-physicists to create this extremely accurate horoscope. All you need to do is find your astrological sign below. Bon appetit!
Just like Brussels Sprouts, you don’t always agree with people but you’re healthy, and enjoyable in small doses.
You’re an extremely reliable side kick. Most people will say they can’t live without you.
You’re thicc, luscious and creamy. Your insecurities may cause you to feel unable to stand on your own.
You’re sweet and sour and a messy bitch.
You’re tough on the outside but soft on the inside. You are extremely attractive, causing people to want to have you in the middle of the night.
Your outgoing personality will cause you to be the center of attention this Holiday season. You have a dry sense of humor.
You’re wholesome but boring, and you make a stink when you’re ignored.
You’re just a little off and nobody’s favorite, but you’re not salty about it.
Sometimes people forget about you but at least your dog is happy to see you.
You’re very sweet but completely nuts. Dentists hate you.
You have so much to offer, and yet nobody wants to touch you.
You are a warm, comforting person. But if someone mistreats you, you have no problem burning them.
Original Post: https://www.funnyordie.com/2018/11/4/18053928/horoscope-signs-thanksgiving-food-astrology